Infertility Archives - The IVF Club

Role of the IVF Nurse

November 1, 2009 By Carol Leave a Comment

One of the more positive aspects of IVF is actually having regular contact with your IVF nurse. Your nurse will fill in all the gaps that your Doctor hasn’t told you about or that you have forgotten to ask. Your nurse who take you through the whole IVF treatment process step by step. She will get you to repeat everything that she has told to make sure that you understand everything that is going on.

The nurse is the person who will make all your blood test and ultrasound appointments for you – at times that they know are convenient for you! They will be your first port of call if anything goes wrong while you are undergoing treatment – like breaking a vial of medicine, like having unusual pain when you shouldn’t. They offer solace and advice when unusual things happen during the treatment process.

They will be the one who will be the one who rings you with your pregnancy test results – positive or negative. They will lead their ear in times of distress. They will recognise when you are close to breaking point and get you in touch with a counseller of need be. They may offer you some impartial advice and answer all your questions even though they have probably heard the same ones millions of time before. They usually will also recommend those questions that you have that you should discuss with your doctor.

The nurses play an important role are the unsung heroes of the whole process. In Friday, I discovered my nurse had moved on to look after another Doctors patients. I was shocked – my trusted advisor was gone. I now had to deal with a new nurse who knows nothing of my history, does not understand me or how I react to things. This is a big change and one that I probably didn’t want to deal with now that I know I will soon be starting yet another IVF cycle.

IVF and Your Sex Life

September 10, 2009 By Carol Leave a Comment

It’s a pretty delicate topic I know but IVF is not conducive a good sex life. For a start, when you are doing a full stimulated cycle, the following passion killers are likely to, and do, happen:

1. You may bleed for several days after you expect your period to end because you have been taking a contraceptive pill since the start of your period
2. You experience intermittent spotting during your cycle whilst you are taking hormonal treatment
3. Quite likely you may bleed after egg collection and will be feeling quite sore and bloated for a couple of days
4. Your breasts may become sensitive to touch so any foreplay is just out of the question
5. Because you are inserting Crinone Gel to line your uterus, you worry that a pile of it will end up on your sheets (it does!)
6. You decide to avoid intercourse for the for 24 hours after transfer (just in case the embryo falls out)
7. Both of you will continue to avoid intercourse cause you are both scared your partners penis might dislodge the embryo (As if! But as IVF is so darn expensive you both don’t want to repeat the process)
8. You then get your period

I think this just about covers the two months when you are cycling. Of course, you do have breaks in between when things get back to normal – whatever that is. But after several cycles of doing this, combined with all that previous experience of trying to conceive, you sex life just diminishes. You know you need it to bring sexy back but it all becomes too hard during this time. Its pretty ironic that this is the case, given that the old testicles need to be used to produce good quality sperm. See my blog on sperm titled Keeping the River Flowing).

The good thing about not doing IVF: Bringing sexy back.

IVF Conception Still Possible

September 2, 2009 By Carol Leave a Comment

A visit to my IVF specialist revealed that he still thinks my husband and I will conceive. So despite being nearly 40 and despite my husbands sperm problems, he still thinks this is a realistic goal.

It’s funny how a Doctor can be so confident when after 7 failures, you are not. So after asking all the probing questions, he still feels we will get pregnant. Apparently, he has done every test possible to me so from his perspective there is no reason why I should not fall pregnant. IVF apparently helps overcome male infertility issues so theoretically, there is no reason why we shouldn’t be able to become parents.

This makes things a little frustrating as it seems everything that should be working isn’t. I guess it puts us in no mans land. The other annoying thing is that IVF is not cheap – not by a long shot so every failure means spending more money on another round. Whilst, you can’t put a cost on what I perceive to be a joy in having a baby, it does place a financial strain on your budget.

So with this in mind we have decided to continue down this path and try again. Fortunately, we have one frozen embryo left from the cycle I did in January. So apart from giving my body a rest from the drugs it means we will use our last remaining embryo. So if this fails, another stimulated cycle is on the cards. In the meantime, I will continue to focus on having a good nutritional diet, no alcohol or coffee – basically following the suggestions in the Pregnancy Miracle ebook I purchased a few weeks ago.

Questions To Ask Your IVF Specialist

August 21, 2009 By Carol Leave a Comment

After seven failed attempts at IVF, there comes a time when you have to ask some pretty hard questions to your Doctor.

I’ve been too frightened too ask – maybe I am not going to like what I might hear. But my visit with the Counsellor today did help in exploring what our options and questions we might ask our Doctor.

The questions are:
– Given our history and 7 failed attempts, what is the likelihood of us conceiving?
– Why do you think we lose so many embryos between day 3 and day 5?
– Do you think it has something to do with my egg quality or my husbands sperm?
– Should we try giving Day 3 embryos a go instead? (or Day 5 if relevant)
– Is there any kind of genetic testing that you think we should do?
– Are there any other tests that you think we should explore?
– Should my husband see an Andrologist?
– Should we have his sperm tested again?
– Are there any other alternatives that we should explore?

I am sure there are some that I have missed but these are the questions that seemed most relevant after repeated IVF failures.

Feel free to post any other questions you might have. We can all learn from other peoples questions.

What Not to Say to Someone Undergoing IVF Treatment

August 14, 2009 By Carol 2 Comments

IVF is unpredictable. My Doctor thinks I should be pregnant by now. This makes me feel a whole lot better. Not! The problem with IVF is that the more times you do it, the harder it gets. I am not exactly sure why but I think that statistically the majority of women get pregnant from IVF after 6-7 stimulated cycles. I have now done 5 stimulated cycles and two transfers and I’ve had no luck. This weight of expectation does not help.

The more you go on, the more there is an expectation that your turn is due. But IVF is never that simple. It makes it hard also for friends and family to understand what we are going through. Often people will say, don’t give up. Keep trying. This is probably one of the worse things people can say.

They need to understand that when you get to the point of doing IVF you have already exhausted all other options – there is already a history of failed natural attempts. IVF gets harder the more times you do it. Apart from the money invested with nothing to show, there is also the physical demands on your body and living a life that has become less social and centred around your menstrual cycle and when and what drugs you are going to take. Life to some extent is on hold. You stay in a job with a manager who is critical and treats you badly because you need stability, you need your job to pay for IVF and you want to be eligible for maternity leave in the event you actually get pregnant.

There is also the fact that you are starting to reach a point where you feel you have no control over your body. It feels like your uterus is destined to become a graveyard.

The fact is that there is nothing anyone can say to their friend. Make it clear you are there for them if they need you but don’t push it. All they can be is a friendly ear and a shoulder to cry on. Because as time goes on, that shoulder is most definitely needed.