After a relaxed couple of weeks convincing myself that I am not pregnant, I am now finding myself sitting here anxiously waiting to hear the results back from my blood test. I mean what are the chances of a day 2 embryo making the cut when every other day 5 embryo I have had hasn’t.
Aunt Flo normally arrives before my blood test, however this time I have taken my blood test a day early. Whilst it is not common for my period to be a day late, it is not uncommon. It just doesn’t happen very often…. but it does happen. The trouble is that the delay is killing me. It is all I can think of and I am finding it difficult to concentrate on what I doing.
Personally I don’t feel pregnant. My breasts are not sore – they stopped being sore about 4 days ago. I have acne on just to the left of my chin – just like the acne I get when I am pre-menstrual. And today I have broken into the lolly jar at work. My cravings for sweets are fairly normal but they do tend to be worse just before my period arrives. So all things considered it is not looking hopeful.
But looking hopeful and being hopeful are two different things. Although I expect the results to be negative, I am more hopeful that they are positive. I think my husband is the same. He even rang to find out the blood test results. He doesn’t normally do that – but then normally I know the outcome before I have the blood test. Imagine if the clinic rings up and tells me that I have a positive result – I reckon I would find it difficult to hide at work. I think I would just scream.
On the other hand, I am going to be so disappointed if it is a negative again – even if that is the result I am expecting. And if that happens, I am reaching out to the bottle. Seems like the longer Aunt Flo takes to come, the more hope you have and this just makes the waiting period more difficult. Its actually killing me. I mean how many times can I inspect the toilet paper in one day. Every trip to the toilet has taken on greater significance. Every time I feel the progesterone cream, I wonder if that is the first sign of Aunt Flo.
How long will it take before the clinic call mes – 1 hour, 2 hours, maybe even 3 at most. I wonder if they call all the people with the positive results first and then call all people with the negative results. I wonder if it was random. If it were me, I reckon I would call with the good news first and then deliver the bad news. That rationale is not really helping me – maybe thats why they aren’t calling me. More bad news – just this time my body is keeping me in suspense.
The countdown continues….. rescue me.